How to have emotional intelligence in times of crisis? We certainly face the most challenging crisis of our lives collectively: risk of contracting a deadly virus, full hospitals, restricted movement of people and opening of trade, economic depression, children at home with no school and a fiery political environment.
To top it off, there is no set date for this chaos to end, so our hopes are pinned on an uncertain future. Keeping the balance to not get carried away by despair and frustration in a context like this, without a doubt, is not an easy task.
But it's necessary. After all, if the situation is difficult, it only tends to get worse if we are not in the best of conditions to make decisions that can impact not only our lives, but that of all the people around us or who are dependent on us.
In this article, I intend to give you some tips to better control your emotions in this and other crises you may face in the future.
Emotional intelligence for those in a hurry
I imagine that you must have at least a vague idea of what emotional intelligence is, as it is a concept that has been circulating for a long time in academia and the media. However, in order not to run the risk of communication noise and to eliminate inaccuracies, it is worth a quick definition on the subject before providing more details on how to have emotional intelligence.
Emotional intelligence is the ability to deal with our emotions and how we react to them. It is a competence that, in order to be developed, requires that we have self-knowledge, understand which emotions affect us in certain circumstances of life and learn the best way to behave in the face of them.
A person who finds it difficult to control their feelings will invariably react inappropriately, impulsively, inconsequently, and of course such behavior ends up generating frustrations - conduct and mood undoubtedly to be avoided at all costs in times when frustration is almost a routine.
People who manage their emotions well are generally more resilient to all kinds of weather, as they have more skills, resources, strategies to maintain balance and not let harmful feelings influence decision-making.
A characteristic common to great leaders is precisely the ability to control the emotional side, be cold-blooded and let rationality speak louder to avoid precipitation that can prove disastrous, either in the short term or in the long term.
Emotional intelligence is home cooking, not fast food.
By using the phrase “how to have emotional intelligence?”, I do not mean that I am promising that you will receive it at the end of the article packaged in a colorful box illustrated with words that sell health.
I am proposing a series of actions that will help you to develop it and maintain it when it is most needed: in times of crisis. After all, emotional intelligence needs to be managed, prepared with the right ingredients and subjected to certain pressures and temperatures. It's a process.
Whoever promises you something different works by challenging your emotional intelligence, not feeding it.
How to have emotional intelligence in times of crisis?
Let's get to the main point of this article. What practices can you adopt to not get carried away by the seesaw of intense and worrying emotions that this crisis arouses with each headline?
How to learn to better manage your emotions?
Normalize your feelings
The first thing to keep in mind for emotional intelligence is that denial only makes things worse. Denying that you're scared, sad, or frustrated doesn't make those feelings go away, it just strengthens them as they get repressed and build up.
Over time, the result is an explosion, out of control, thoughtless attitudes fueled by the desire to restore peace at any cost.
An attitude to avoid this harmful accumulation is to disclose these feelings, to speak aloud what you are feeling. Therefore, talking, approaching people who love you, who are feeling the same as you, helps to have more support and normalize these feelings.
pay attention to yourself
Following the tips on how to have emotional intelligence, when you have intense feelings that tend to hamper your judgment, your actions (fear, anger, joy, love, etc.), pay attention to what caused these emotions.
Close your eyes, observe your internal reaction and your external behavior. Over time, when you understand what your triggers are, what makes you feel these sensations and behave in a certain way, you will be able to use this to your advantage.
For example, using anger to set boundaries or grieving when something sad happens and then starting over.
Inform yourself with quality and moderation
Thinking about how to have emotional intelligence in times of a pandemic, a providential measure is to inform yourself at a certain time of the day and through reliable sources.
The news for the next few months doesn't promise to be more positive than negative. Therefore, staying all the time receiving information, looking for it, being bombarded by it will not do your emotional good.
The recommendation is not to isolate yourself from the world, live in a tribe or a cave, but only inform yourself at a certain time of the day so you can process the information at once and spend the rest of the time without worrying too much.
Rumors can cause unnecessary stress and fear. So try to get information only from reliable sources.
Use your time creatively
If you are respecting WHO standards or are able to respect them, you are in quarantine. But even if you're not, your options are limited. After all, at least as I write this article, several cities and several Spanish states are in lockdown, albeit mild compared to that put in place in Europe.
This means that you will have to spend a lot of time in the same place, closed and, when you are not working, with free and idle time. This is a great time to chat with friends and family, write or read a book, learn a new language.
Keeping yourself busy and in touch with people is key to avoiding feelings of isolation and negative feelings like anxiety, depression, etc.
Another interesting practice to relieve pressure is meditation.
Seek professional help
Closing the tips on how to have emotional intelligence, there are people who, even following all these tips, cannot ease the pressure and remain in control. This may be due to a chronic difficulty to remain emotionally stable, a difficulty derived from trauma in childhood or throughout adult life.
For these cases, the best option is to seek professional support.
Psychotherapy is the most common treatment. It helps the individual to identify past traumas that have repercussions on the present and to better deal with them. The patient undergoes mental exercises to reframe these events and learns techniques to master emotions in specific moments of crisis.
One technique that has become popular, although it has long been practiced, is hypnotherapy, a treatment that uses hypnotic methods to access the patient's subconscious and identify past misprocessed experiences.
Its popularity is due to the fact that it obtains faster results and, in most cases, dispenses with the use of drugs, which can generate dependence if consumed for a long period.
- Discover the benefits of emotional intelligence
- Learn to deal with anxiety during the pandemic
- Practice patience during quarantine
- Emotional intelligence: understand its importance
The crisis, it seems, will unfortunately take time to pass. But an hour will pass. And so that we can celebrate and live this great moment that awaits us in the best possible way, we can't relax with our physical and mental health.
Study the topic, talk to people, seek help. Together, we will come out stronger and with a whole future ahead of us.
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